JOHN BUTHORN . FOUNDER, CENTER FEDELIS
What matters deserves a closer look.
Your service is an important part of your life, but it isn't the whole story.
One-on-one coaching for law enforcement professionals, first responders, military personnel, and veterans who want to bring their decisions, relationships, and goals into closer alignment with the life they want to live.
Marine Corps veteran * Retired NYPD Sergeant * Social worker * 25+ years listening
You have relationships, responsibilities, personal goals, and decisions that matter within and beyond your profession.
Beyond the role
Sometimes you're facing something new. Other times, you're trying to understand a situation or behavior that keeps coming up.
I'm John Buthorn. As a Marine Corps veteran, retired NYPD Sergeant, and social worker, I've spent more than 25 years listening to people, examining circumstances, and asking the tough questions to better understand what's happening.
YOUR LIFE YOUR PRIORITES. YOUR NEXT MOVE
You don't need a crisis to want something to change.
Whether you're actively serving or have moved on to another chapter, your relationships, ambitions, and values deserve attention too. Maybe something here sounds familiar.
An important decision
You're weighing options about your career, family, or personal life and want to make a choice you can feel confident about.
A relationship that needs attention
Improving communication, rebuilding trust after a betrayal, navigating a difficult experience, or deciding what you want from a relationship.
A new chapter
Preparing for retirement, leaving military service, changing careers, taking on new responsibilities, or figuring out what's next.
A familiar pattern
You keep responding to certain situations in ways you'd like to change, but knowing what to do differently hasn't been enough.
A personal goal
Something you want to accomplish, but competing responsibilities, habits, or uncertainty about where to begin keep getting in the way.
Living by your values
You know what's important to you, but some decisions or behaviors don't always reflect the person you want to be.
Competing priorities
You're meeting your obligations to others but want more room for your relationships, interests, and personal goals.
You don't have to figure everything out on your own.
Someone who understands the professional world you've been part of, while taking the time to understand you as an individual.
WORKING TOGETHER
I'll help you examine what's happening, recognize patterns that may be influencing your choices, and develop practical approaches that fit your circumstances. The goal isn't simply to understand your life better. It's to use that understanding to take meaningful steps.
WHY CENTER FIDELIS
Stay true to what matters. Live in a way that reflects it.
Fidelis means faithful. It's a word that stayed with me from my time in the Marine Corps, but its meaning goes beyond service.
We all have values, relationships, and goals that matter to us. Yet responsibilities, habits, and changing circumstances can pull our choices away from what's important.
Center Fidelis is about bringing the life you're living into closer alignment with the life you want to live.
UNDERSTANDING YOUR SITUATION
Finding a way forward.
“I spend so much time handling things at work, but when I get home, I don't seem to have the same patience with my family.”
The approaches that serve you under pressure professionally may not always work as well at home. Here's how we'd work through it together.
Understand what's influencing you
Drawing on my knowledge of human behavior, habits, and how circumstances shape the way we respond.
Name what you'd like to change
And why it matters to you.
Build practical approaches
A better transition between work and home, recognizing familiar reactions, or approaching conversations differently.
Practice, review, adjust
Put changes into practice, see what works, and refine along the way.
My role isn't simply to help you understand what's happening. It's to help you use that understanding to make changes that reflect the person you want to be.
25+
MEET JOHN
Experience that shapes how I listen.
United States Marine Corps
Taught me about responsibility, discipline, and how our commitments influence the decisions we make.
NYPD Detective & Sergeant
Investigative and supervisory roles taught me to examine circumstances, look beyond initial explanations, and understand what drives people's actions.
Graduate education in social work
A deeper understanding of how thoughts, emotions, experiences, relationships, and environments influence our decisions.
years of listening
THE PROGRAM
Six months of individualized support.
Not a predetermined set of lessons, and never being told how to live. Regular conversations with someone who understands your background, gets to know your circumstances, and builds on each conversation rather than starting over.
Your program includes
Individualized one-on-one coaching
60-minute video sessions every two weeks
Limited messaging support between sessions
Practical applications to apply and track
Regular progress reviews and adjustments
$450 / month
Cancel anytime
First conversation is free
Coaching is a personal development service, separate from psychotherapy or clinical mental health treatment.
BEYOND THE UNIFORM - THE BLOG
Essays on life within and beyond service.
Relationships
The Drive Home: Why the Shift Between Work and Family Matters
The alertness that serves you on the job doesn't switch off when you pull into the driveway. A closer look at the space between work and home.
October 28, 2026 · 5 min read
Habits & Patterns
When Knowing What to Do Isn't Enough
You already know what you should do differently. So why does the same reaction keep showing up? On familiar patterns and how they change.
October 14, 2026 · 4 min read
Transitions
Retirement Is More Than a Date on the Calendar
Leaving the job or the service changes more than your schedule. What to think about as you step into the next chapter.
September 30, 2026 · 6 min read
FREE FIRST COVERSATION
Let's have a conversation.
Whether you're actively serving, preparing for a transition, or have been retired for years, there's more to your life than the role you've held.
You don't need to have everything figured out. Our first conversation is free: tell me a little about what's on your mind, ask questions, and see whether working together makes sense.
No pressure. No obligation.